Here is a question Karen asked:
So, the recent comments and posts about manifesting marriage have got me thinking. When Neville talks about his own imagining in his story.. he talks about how he was still married to one woman, but wanted to be married to another specific woman.
So he imagined that he was happily married to the second woman and soon the first wife gave him a divorce. ..Then he married the woman that he had imagined marrying. ..
Then in the most recent post that I read he talks about how you should imagine being married happily, but it shouldn’t be “that man or no man.”
How is that? Please explain what appears to me as a double standard… thank you.
Lets Dive in
First, Neville and that woman were both in love… They both wanted to get married to each other…
In most of the questions about specific person, that is almost NEVER the case… quite often it is quite the opposite… Where the ‘other’ has made it cleared they didn’t want that, to the point of cutting them off and blocking them.
Another point.. What Neville really imagined was being happily married and he did know to who.. He was sure of it!
like he himself said over and over..
whenever anyone told him they wanted to be married and it had to be that one…
he would straight up tell them…
no you don’t… you don’t want THAT one.. you want to be happily married.
Neville was married twice.
Neville married his first wife and they had a son, and he said that he knew almost from the beginning that the marriage wasn’t working, and they separated, but he could not get her to agree to a divorce.
In the meantime, he met this woman whom he said that as soon as he saw her, he knew he was going to marry her. “She didn’t know it, but I knew it.”
They were involved as friends for MANY years (traveled to Barbados and met Neville’s family etc) but Neville never took that “she is going to be my wife.” Rather, he felt it real that they were already married.
Eventually, Neville took the step and made it happen in imagination – sleeping as if she was in the other bed, and they were married – and within a week, his first wife was picked up on a shoplifting charge; Neville was called as a character witness, and he said good things on her behalf, and as a result, she signed the divorce papers, he got divorced, and married his second wife.
Did you notice that Neville and his wife both obviously imagined “married” and both obviously imagined “married to each other” at some point?
And then – the incidents needed for that to happen were set in motion
Even when you are ALREADY happily married. If you make “your happy” based on THEM… Welcome to hell…. It’s NEVER about them…. It’s always about you.